Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category

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Heavy on my heart…

Friday, February 19th, 2010

This was laid heavy on my heart after some quiet time of reflection on a plane last night and felt compelled to share.

By what right do I receive the love of God or the sacrifices that were made by Jesus?  I am not worthy or deserving of that which I am to receive or will gain from the relationship I have with Christ.  I have and thankfully receive mercy that is freely given though I deserve death and punishment.  Haven’t I  participated in the rebellion against the throne? Haven’t I denied him by not humbling myself completely to his teaching and turning from my sin?  Can’t I claim the name Judas, but I was given the name Son, Bride and Beloved.  I am treated as a son, celebrated for returning home and not shunned for my betrayal or banished for my treachery.  I have received compassion and forgiveness without reason or conditions that is unfathomable.  I do not receive what is deserved because of the infinite mercy of God.  God’s shows us His goodness and compassion by confronting my suffering and guilt through compassion, mercy.  His mercy is great enough to cover any pain that hurt my spirit man, but I have to be willing to accept it.  I must not only accept His mercies, but believe and live within it.  To not live knowing that God is compassionate and kind and offers mercy to me is to short change your relationship with the Him and to not value His sacrifice.

Though I have earned banishment I will enjoy communion with God.

Posted in Life, Thoughts, theologian | No Comments »

Green Gumball

Thursday, February 11th, 2010

Special Green GumballYeah…. It is a gumball, but not just any gumball.  This morning my son followed me downstairs as I prepared to leave for work.  I was already running late, but it was obvious he needed a few minutes with me before I left for the day.  He told me in short order about his evening having dinner with his Grandmother and a trip to the candy store.  He asked me if I had seen his bag of candy, because he had something for me in it.  Now in that bag was Jelly Bellys, rock candy and a big green gumball.  If you know me you know I love Jelly Bellys and if you know Connor you know he has a fascination for gumballs.  So, I was expecting that he would be handing me some Jelly Bellys, but he beamed from ear to ear and pulled out the big green gumball.  He went on to tell me how he picked the gumball out for me, because he thought I would like it and he missed me. He reached out and handed me the gumball and said, eat it.  But I couldn’t eat it at that moment, because it became a reminder of my son’s love and how he missed me when I was at work and not around.  I carried that gumball in my pocket all day and it has reminded me that my most important job is  a father and to be there for my son and my daughters.

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Facebook Cited in 20% of 2009 Divorces

Wednesday, December 30th, 2009

Facebook Screenshot

An interesting or maybe I should say concerning stat for 2009 is the percentage of divorces citing Facebook in the decree. I don’t think Facebook deserves the whopping 20% of the mentions or blame.  I personally believe that parties start grasping for ammunition and ways to hurt their spouse in divorce proceedings.  What I do believe is that Facebook makes a permanent public record of much of the behavior that happens in a generally more passive manner or within the hidden heart of man.  Do not get me wrong, I do think that the tool can lead to or make improper behavior easier, but the true issue is the heart of man.  Consider the casual conversation with coworkers or quick phone conversations; do they have any sense of flirting or sexual tension?  My point is; often, much what happens on Facebook happens between men and women in professional, civic and social settings, but are fleeting moments that are not thoroughly placed under examination.  Consider this, would you be comfortable with your spouse hanging at a bar daily with singles, former significant others and prowlers looking for an opportunity to encroach on their life?

I would suggest that you use great caution with all networking tools, not stop using them. They can make you vulnerable to people that you might normally avoid or not see in your day-to-day life and they provide a perceived secret place to do some “harmless” flirting. Be wary and open with your spouse as to prevent any acts of betrayal of trust.

Article on Facebook and Divorce Stats http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/facebook/6857918/Facebook-fuelling-divorce-research-claims.html.

Posted in Community, Leadership, Life, Technology, Thoughts | No Comments »

Patrick Swayze’s death put me in a funk.

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

When I learned that Patrick Swayze died it put me in a funk. I am not a Swayze fanatic, though I did love Red Dawn and many of his other movies.  What did happen is that his death triggered a lot of memories of the death of my Dad. Dad also died of pancreatic cancer at the age of 53 on September 12, 2002. The similarities in Swayze’s death and my Dad’s have caused me to reflect upon his life and remember how much I miss his counsel. He was diligently there and willing to assist in anything that I may need his assistance in resolving.  Currently, I am working through some big decisions that will affect my family and others and his ear and words would have been a great comfort. I guess I was wallowing in my self-pity and needed something to reset my thinking. Well it came from my daily reading as defined by YouVersion (http://www.youversion.com/) on my BlackBerry during my commute. It included Luke 7, which demonstrates that Jesus did and does have compassion for our situation. H is empathetic and is moved to meet us in those moments.  I must remember that the same compassion He showed the widow He will show me and we are to show to other.

To say that the funk is gone would be a lie, but things do look clearer.

Posted in Life, Ramblings, Thoughts | No Comments »

Discussing Heaven and Hell

Wednesday, August 19th, 2009

I keep finding myself in conversations discussing what is to come, promises of heaven, and the certainty of hell.  The subject is something that I am all too familiar with and have been more than eager to jump right in the middle of it with my absolutes and practices rebuttals.  This has came all too easy, with my years of absoluteness and closed minded training that I received in a Christian denomination that’s focus was on health, wealth and having all the answers.  I can’t tell you how many times that I have been through Revelations 21 and marveled as a child the descriptions that were derived on the materials and architecture of heaven. As I’ve grown older and my faith has matured to the point that I believe I can say it is my own I have come to believe that so much of the conversation around heaven and hell is an exercise in missing the point.

Let me be clear that I do believe it is natural and I myself enjoy wondering and discussing what it may be like one day.  But, should our focus be on the wonder of heaven or the absolute destruction of hell?  I am inclined to say no.  I believe the Gospel teaches us to focus on loving God and people.  Our hearts and actions should be focused on bring heaven to the earth now and bless people around us now.  Shouldn’t our consuming desire is to serve our God, Love God, and serve those that He loves, which is tough, because that is everyone. If we could set our minds on these things wouldn’t our lives be complete? Wouldn’t heaven become no less important, but no the focus of our existence and allow us to invest in our responsibilities now? Shouldn’t heaven be a bonus and the real prize is true fellowship with our Lord Jesus?  When I stop and think that I have been chosen and pursued by God to be in relationship with Him I am not sure what Heaven is or Hell is really matters any more.

Posted in Life, Ministry, Ramblings, Thoughts | 1 Comment »

Sundays

Sunday, September 21st, 2008

Sundays have become my favorite day of the week. I have gotten to where I look forward to it each week. It is the one day of the week where Em and I do our best to not set a schedule or make many plans. This wasn’t intentional at first, but we have now made it part of every week. This has become a great opportunity to hang out with my kids and make dinner with Em. The kids love the dedicated time to watch football, play video games, read, eat a meal together and review homework. I would highly recommend it as a part of your week.

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Posted in Family, Ramblings, Thoughts | 1 Comment »

Rough Year

Wednesday, September 17th, 2008

It has been rough year and I pray it is coming to a close. I am so tired and jaded.

Last summer, 2007, projects at work were at full steam and one of my grandmothers passed away, Anne Jones. It was a little bittersweet, since it was in many ways the last connection to my Dad’s family. With her passing it also brought back a lot of memories of my Dad. But I was able to bear down and get through and return to work within a couple of days from her passing.

Since then, I have been through some personal turmoil brought on by friends and family. The kind of things that just don’t go away. Those things that dig into your soul and change you even though you try to not let it.

There has been more changes at work than I can ever go into here. Some changes have been positive, but many have left me frustrated. I still believe things are resolvable and never as dire as they may feel in the moment.

I was diagnosed with an abnormality in my right lung in late winter of his year. (see previos postings under surgery) I had to have a large section of my right lung removed. The procedure required 8 weeks of rested recovery, but only just starting to feel normal.

In the Spring my wife was released from her job of 5 years do to discrimination. There is a lawsuit pending at this time. The stay has heard the charges and giving us a letter of agreement and the right to sue.

This summer has been a wash, since the average work week has been roughly 60+ hours. Beyond the crazy work schedule I lost my mom’s mother, so my last surviving grand has passed. This required another rush trip to Texas and doing my best to support my mom. Just a couple of weeks from my Grands passing Em lost an uncle unexpectedly.

The positive thing was an unplanned pregnancy and a new beautiful baby girl, Maddy. My family remains by my side through all of this and continue to support me. I am so fortunate to have them there when I return home everyday.

God please stop this roller coaster I need to ride the merry-go-ride for a bit.

sent from my iPhone

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Posted in Ramblings, Thoughts, Work | No Comments »

America’s Next Top Pastor

Wednesday, August 6th, 2008

This is freaking hilarious and sad all wrapped up in one! How closely it hits the mark on portraying the lengths the new relevant church goes to be accepted in the culture. What is even more worrisome is how soon will it be before churches do go to the popularity contest for pastor selection.

I might argue many already have?

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Almost Myself . . .

Wednesday, April 9th, 2008

It has been almost 4 weeks since I was released from the hospital and I am finally starting to feel like myself. I have almost weaned myself completely off the Vicodin and made the switch completely to Ibuprofen. It has been over 24 hours since my last Vicodin and I am really pleased about it. I have been able to get out of the house and become more mobile; which I am so thankful for. My incision is completely healed and surprisingly doesn’t look too bad.

The signs that I am returning to normal is am feeling so cagey and starting to build to-do lists and plan my days. I am also starting to make good use of my days, such as cataloging my CD collection. Now if only the weather would cooperate I would sit out on the deck and get some sun.

Posted in Ramblings, Surgery, Thoughts | No Comments »

Evolve or Revolt Part 2

Wednesday, February 20th, 2008

I know some may feel I am mincing words, but I am thinking out loud here.Isn’t a revolution something that is more likely to bring destruction and division not the inward change that is actually sought? Revolutions force change on a system or people, not actually bring them to a change. Revolutions are usually marked with violent changes to individuals or systems in an attempt to change thinking or behavior. Maybe real transformation comes from a gradual change in thought and behavior and not a change in behavior that is forced or demanded? A traumatic change that is forced is a revolution to that person’s thinking. But when a person changes their thoughts and behaviors through growth and development that is evolution. Doesn’t REAL change in character come from the growth in an area in your life, not the change that you are required to do.

Take this example. I can tell, require, my son to not make fun of his sister or he will be in grounded from an activity. He most likely will comply with my demands, as long as that which may be taken away is important to him and we are near. But it never fails, when we are not around trouble ensues. His sister will come to us complaining about what her brother said about her. My son hasn’t really changed at all, but only changed his behavior due to a demand; if he had a real heart change then it would not come up again. I could argue that my son has suffered a revolutionary change of thinking that he has been subjected to. When he adopts the change gradually over time and makes it a part of his core being, because he believes in it than that would be an evolutionary change.

Continued later . . .

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Evolve or Revolt

Tuesday, February 19th, 2008

So what would you prefer a Revolution or an Evolution in the transformation of the church?

Revolution –noun (root Revolt)
1. An overthrow or repudiation and the thorough replacement of an established government or political system by the people governed.
2. Sociology. a radical and pervasive change in society and the social structure, esp. one made suddenly and often accompanied by violence.

Vs.

Evolution –noun (root Evolve)
1. Any process of formation or growth; development: the evolution of a language; the evolution of the airplane.
2. A product of such development; something evolved: The exploration of space is the evolution of decades of research.
3. A process of gradual, peaceful, progressive change or development, as in social or economic structure or institutions.

More to come soon . . .

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Hollywood and Politics

Sunday, February 10th, 2008

I have always had concern with Hollywood and their influence on politics in this country. Hollywood has an incredibly strong voice that can be used to sway the opinion of many American people. Unfortunately, this will most likely come off wrong, but I am not sure there is another way of saying this, but a large portion of people are not willing to make their opinion and are unwilling to do their own research to form that opinion. Here lies my concern; celebrities can garner the attention and publicity because of their status, which can persuade the weak minded and star-struck individuals.

Ryan Reynolds

I say all this to put into context something I read this morning that really made my morning. One of my favorite current actors is Ryan Reynolds. He voiced his opinion to Entertainment Weekly and I can’t say that I can agree more. Reynolds said, “When it comes to politics, I think the best medicine is for most celebrities to have a steaming-hot bowl of shut the f— up.” In this quote it is noted that Reynolds is in the process of becoming a U.S. citizen, mostly so he can vote. (Entertainment Weekly – February 15, 2008)

In my opinion this is well said.

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